- In anticipation of the Olympics, questions about Canada
-

edanam
- November 5th, 2009
snitched from Susan's sff.net because I just had to share:
> Now that Vancouver has won the chance to host the 2010 Winter
> Olympics, these are some questions people from all over the world are asking.
>
> Believe it or not these questions about
> Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website.
>
>
>
> Q: I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants
> grow?
> ( England)
> A. We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch them
die.
>
> Q: Will
> I be able to see Polar Bears in the street?
> ( USA )
> > A: Depends on how much you've been drinking.
>
> Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto - can I follow the Railroad tracks?
( Sweden)
> A: Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water.
>
> Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada ?
> ( Sweden)
> A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.
>
> Q: Are there any ATM's (cash machines) in Canada ?
> Can you send me a list of them in Toronto , Vancouver ,
> Edmonton and Halifax ?
> ( England> )
> A: No, but you'd better bring a few extra furs for trading purposes.
>
> Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada ?
> ( USA> )
> A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe
> Ca-na-da is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo
racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked.
>
> Q: Which direction is North in Canada ?
> ( USA )
> A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll
send the rest of the directions.
>
> Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada?
> (> England )
> A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.
>
> Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA )
> A: Aus-t ri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh
forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver
and in Calgary , straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
>
> Q: Do you have perfume in Canada
> ? ( Germany )
> A: No, WE don't stink.
>
> Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Where can
I sell it in Canada ?
> (USA> )
> A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
>
> Q: Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population
is smaller than the male population? ( Italy
> )A: Yes, gay nightclubs.
>
> Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada ?
> ( USA )
> A: Only at Thanksgiving.
>
> Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round?
> (> Germany > )
> A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is illegal.
>
> Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada , but I forget
> its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. ( USA )
>
> A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the
> brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by
> spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.
>
> Q: > Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )
> A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.
>